yes. again.

If you read this blog because you are a newish writer, like myself, then this post is for you.  If you’ve been querying endlessly and never seem to get a bite, this post is for you as well.  If you are super-awesome queryman/woman then read this anyway and add your helpful comments.  The topic of queries will be on-going throughout the week and the more info available, the better.

A Twitter friend and I were jabbering about the difficulty of condensing her 90,000+ word novel into two hundred much-too-short, must-be-stunning words.  The conversation eventually devolved to us writing “Dear Agent” letters–what is in on the surface of our hearts or pretty much for me, what I thought was funny.

Agent Query Connect is a website billed as “the internet’s most interactive social networking community for the publishing industry”.  I don’t know for a fact that it’s the MOST interactive blah blah…but it is very helpful indeed.  And best of all, IT’S FREE.

My favorite groups:

AQ Connect – Query Critique Corner- when you put your query up here people from all over will swoop in to give you advice.  Some of it is very helpful and some of it requires a thick skin.  But if you didn’t have a thick skin you wouldn’t be putting your writing out for all to see…right?  Take it with a grain of salt.  Use what sounds right for you and matches what the helpful literary agents say they want in a query.  Remember, some of the people commenting are just as novice as you, so don’t take everything to heart.  (Oh, and paste your query into the body of your discussion.  Many people don’t want to open attachments for obvious reasons.)

First Page Critique – Put your first page up and see how many people would like to keep reading.

First Chapter(s) Critique - Same as above, only you have slightly longer to hook a reader.

The five most popular groups:

AQ Connect – Query Critique Corner

First Page Critique

AQ Connect – Agent Updates

First Chapter(s) Critique

AQ Connect – New Member Shout-Out!

I spent quite a bit of time last week on AQ Connect polishing my query which was so covered in soot, it was really hard to know it was a query at all.  In other words, I learned a whole heckuva lot about query writing.  This is not to say that I’m an expert or that I can’t learn any more.  I’ve lived long enough to know that you never know everything about even one subject.  More on queries later this week…

flu-like symptoms and super tweet edition

1. Ah, fever…chills how I hate thee.

2. What Ann Curry tweeted earlier: “Here we go. Last week of August flu cases rose sharply. H1N1 is believed to be most of those cases. Wash your hands.”

3. Been working on my query all day for  this contest…

4. Another embarrassing video.  I love to humiliate myself…why?

5. Thanks to Jolyn Palliata for letting me beta read her awesome novel, Amber Eyes…watch out for this one.

6. Um, Danae (pronounced Dani) Ayusso is one of the most interesting people I have ever “met”.  She can write 10,000 words, send out 75 query letters–twitter and email all in ONE day…not kidding.  And she just got a request for a full!  Way to go Danae!

7. @johannaharness wants everyone to take a pic of their workspaces and tweet to #amwriting, she was so nice to say something positive about mine.

8. Am I trying to be the queen of links?  No, but you can call me the princess if you want.

9. OMK (kittens) I haven’t read a published book all week…weird.

10. Gonna remedy that with my 40% off coupon to Borders!

11. Not adding pics today…so sorry.

12. My oldest caught the video bug and started filming a 6 min. video for each of our pets.  They are surprisingly funny.

13. The animals aren’t as funny as my son’s comments.

14. What I want to read ASAP: The Hunger Games

15. Comment people–I get lonely.

That is a question crossing a lot of minds these days.  My husband talked me into joining late last May.  He hasn’t made a comment SINCE May.  I, on the other hand have had 267 – one-hundred and forty characters or less comments.

Reasons NOT to Join Twitter:

1.  You may become addicted. Seriously, no kidding here.

2.  You start thinking and talking in 140 characters or less.  I’ve always been that way–but I can see how it would be problematic for some.  Hey, I think there are a couple of people I might invite to join. **scratching chin in a knowing way**

3.  It’s yet another place to regret what you’ve said.

4.  When the site is down, there is a possibility for adverse effects on your sanity.

5.  You have to learn a whole new jargon… hashtags (#), RT (re-tweet), DM (direct message), FF (follow Friday) and many, many more!

Reasons TO join Twitter

1.  You get to meet fantastic people that you otherwise would never meet.  I’ve met about five people who are really cool and helpful writers and they’re NICE on top of it all.

2.  There’s the possibility that someone famous will like what you say and repeat it to the masses, giving you credit, of course.

3.  It’s a great way to advertise your blog, product, service.

4.  Everyone understands when you state that “you need to take a social networking break”.

5.  People share the coolest things they find online, commiserate with each other…basically communicate.

This is all considering that you do what I do and only follow people that you’ve checked out fairly well.  If they have a blog, look at it and see if they are compatible with your standards or you may end up with unwanted trash in your tweets.  If that does happen there’s hope, you can always unfollow them.

Jen Learns Something New

Here it is!  The much awaited return of fifteen for friday!

1.  School is in.

2.  Yesterday I noticed three blooms on my flower.  Normally it only has two, and when I see another about to bloom I know that one flower will fall off before it gets a chance to open.  This is the first time there have been three blooms all at once actually attached to the plant.  I was pondering the reason why this made me so happy.  It has to be that it was unexpected and it involved a pretty lilac colored flower that has a perfect yellow circle in the middle.

3.  A BIG thank you to Jodi, Coy and Amy this week for reading and giving me invaluable feedback.  You guys are great!!!

4. Fun site of the week - www.mentalfloss.com

5.  As You Wish came out this week.  Don’t forget to pick up a copy.

6.  Finally read Keeping the Moon by Sarah Dessen.  I’m noticing that I like her books almost in copyright date order, favorites being the newest.  In other words, I really didn’t like Keeping the Moon so much.  But I’m looking forward to Along for the Ride, the only one I haven’t read yet and her newest.

7.  The forget-me-nots have grown, but why aren’t they flowering?

8.  I feel like I’m forgetting something.

9.  Good Girls by Laura Ruby –Wow, very modern.  I guess kids these days are having to deal with the issues covered in this book–everything you do can be photographed and sent to everyone you know–yikes.

10.  the sweet, terrible, glorious year i truly, completely lost it by Lisa Shanahan–I really liked this book especially following the heaviness of Good Girls…not that the sweet… isn’t heavy in its own way.  But it has a lot of very funny moments and some outrageous ones.  Gemma’s older sister is getting married and decides her theme will be animals who mate for life.  Sis dresses Gemma up as a SWAN for her flower girl outfit.  The story is set in Australia and has a few quirky words and phrases, but it’s all very followable.  I was a little confused about “the tip” which I could only surmise was a piece of undesirable land that smelled awful.

11.  Girl in Development by Jordan Roter made me realize that the way I tend to write (casual writing, mind you) in “valley girl” may not be the best idea.  Yeah, it’s cute for a little while, but it’s looking more and more immature when I read it from someone else.  I was excited about this book and picked it up because of the blurbs on the back.  It was an okay read.

12.  The three books I picked up at the library all had a copyright date of 2006.  Is that weird or what?

13.  When will I wise up and make it FIVE for Friday?

14.  Random thought (I told you this might happen…no, I did…back in the beginning) is dim sum the same thing as dumplings and pot stickers?  I could look that up, I know…just killing numbers here.

15.  Could someone please please publish me please?! Thanks.

Dear to us are those who love us… but dearer are those who reject us as unworthy, for they add another life; they build a heaven before us whereof we had not dreamed, and thereby supply to us new powers out of the recesses of the spirit, and urge us to new and unattempted performances.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

I’m not sure I find the people who send me rejection letters “dear” but I do think they make me want to try harder and be better.  Here’s an excerpt from my latest rejection regarding my short story:

I hope you’ll consider us again, and I wish you the best success in placing this story elsewhere.

I love it!  My very first non-form rejection!  Notice the change in font indicating the move from form to non-form, isn’t it bee-utiful?  Okay, okay it really sucks that they didn’t like the story and yes I am a little embarrassed to share my lack of skills–but it just felt like the thing to do.  And now that I’m done lamenting the rejection I’ve been urged to a new and unattempted performance…aka more editing!

The self-interview is a rare occurrence.  If thought through fully, one would hardly see the benefit of asking one’s self questions and then answering them…oneself.  Half the stuff I get done wouldn’t if I thought things through fully, (and I don’t get all that much done, kids) so, anyway…what was my point?  Oh yes, instead of waiting to become published and then, of course, famous for my ah-mahzing skillz, or instead of waiting to receive a “25 random things about me” note on Facebook–I’m going ahead and giving myself the third degree.  Just so you know, I’m no pushover interviewer.  Tough questions will be asked, we’ll just have to wait and see if they are answered.  I skipped all the hellos and how-de-doos and included only the meat of the interview:

Q:  I see that you’ve been posting on your blog a lot less lately.  Is there a reason for this?

A:  Not a good one.

Q:  Right.  K.  Your public has noticed that you can’t seem to keep your blog on one subject or another…one day it’s about your kids, the next about some writerly thing.  Why is this?

A:  My kids aren’t loony enough to write about every day and I don’t actually know much writer stuff so I just write what I know, ya know?

Q:  How many freakin’ pets do you have anyway?

A:  Wow, that was really out of the blue… ah, wasn’t expecting that one.  Let’s see.  2 dogs (Sam and Lola–and no they were not named after Denise Richard’s children.  That’s just a happy coincidence),  3 cats (Cally, Lil Kat and P.J.), and 2 turtles (Squirty and Toothbrush).  That makes 7 in all.

Q:  Why the heck would you name a pet Toothbrush?

A:  I’m sorry, that’s just a little too personal.

Q:  Moving on then.  Why do you use so very very many ellipses, parentheses, and em dashes?

A:  Why not I always say!  Plus it’s how I talk…gotta get that rhythm right.

Q:  What do you hope to accomplish with this self-interview?

A:  To kill some time.  Ha ha, honestly I’m bored.

Q:  That is so interesting.  Have you ever thought about renting a personality?

A:  It’s way cheaper than buying, that’s for sure.  And then you can try as many out as you want without committing.

Q:  That was an insult.

A:  That wasn’t a question.

Q:  Okay, this interview is over.  I don’t think we’re going to actually find anything out about this person.

A:  That wasn’t a question either.

The dogs seemed uncharacteristically happy when I came home from dropping the kids off to school this morning.  Lola hopped around wagging her tail and spinning in the only way a barrel tummied, bow-legged, bearded terrier can.  She’d already been fed, watered and let loose in the backyard.  I could only surmise that she knew what day it was.  The start of 7 hours a day, five days a week where the only noises are Sam (my corgi mix) snoring and me punching the keyboard (or doing a little snoring myself–wait, I don’t snore).  So I danced with her for a moment, letting her get her wiggles out and exclaiming that yes, I do know that the kids aren’t here.

This is the first year my daughter actually cared what her hair looked like, “Mommy, can you make my hair so the ends point out like this?” and she swooped her hands away from her head indicating a flip hairdo.  “Yes, sweetie I sure can!”  A good hair drying with a round brush, hairspraying and curling the ends later my daughter looked in the mirror and smiled a giddy smile, “It’s perfect!”

My middle child searched, yes, searched and FOUND(!!!) a belt, which I know within two weeks will be shunned for another five minutes of morning TV.  No messing with hair here, the lady at the hair-cutters unceremoniously shaved it all off a week ago (I could’ve done that for free!)  He checked and rechecked to make sure he had everything he needed.

My oldest was definitely cool about the whole first-day thing.  But I could tell he was ready to go back because he was dressed and had eaten before I even woke up this morning.

When I picked them up after school they talked over each other, mentioning old friends, favorite teachers and some not so favorite ones.  My middle child told me that he will know when his math teacher is having a bad day because he will continually brew and consume coffee during class if this is the case.  The less coffee, the happier the teacher.  We laughed.

I took them to the store to get stuff to make cookies.  We came home and my baby helped me make the dough.  I let them eat more cookies in a row than I think I ever have.  It was that kind of day.

This weekend I read This Lullaby by Sarah Dessen – I hate to say it but I didn’t enjoy this book.  I kept waiting for something to happen and it just never did.  It won’t put me off Dessen forever or anything…here’s my ranking so far of Dessen novels in order of enjoyment: 1. Lock and Key 2. Someone Like You 3. The Truth About Forever 4. This Lullaby.  I expect that This Lullaby will remain at the end of the list however long it gets.

Another, much more enjoyable read this weekend was Boone’s Lick by Larry McMurtry.  Funny, I just realized that I kept waiting for something big to happen in that one too.  There was definitely more action than in the Dessen novel (did I just compare YA fic with a western?) but it wasn’t up to McMurtry’s normal heart-pounding and gut-wrenching abilities.  It wasn’t nearly as serious as the Lonesome Dove series but not as comedic as Sin Killer either.  I get the feeling it was written for fun–as an easy-going western.  That said, it was still superbly written with McMurtry’s trademark realistic almost lyrical back woodsy prose.

I don’t know if it’s a great idea to jump from reading a pulitzer-prize winning novelist’s book to editing my own un-published work, but that’s exactly what I did.  Then again, maybe it was good, since it made me realize that my manuscript needs a massive overhaul.  It wasn’t my first hint.

oleander aka sea rose

After an excellent tell-it-like-it-is reader told me like it was, I recognized there were some serious issues.  1st massively major edit: Switching from omniscient point of view to first person.  This will not be the first time I have done this…just the first time I’ve had to do it with 65,000 words.  It means that scenes will have to be cut…the scenes that my protagonist, Cate wouldn’t have seen.

Which leads to 2nd massively major edit: I will have to shimmy the information in somewhere else.  Thus creating the major overhaul.  Another good thing…I hadn’t written really much of anything for years and years when I started Sea Rose.  It’s safe to say that I have a lot more written words under my belt at this point so re-writing is a positive.

Some might say, why not scrap the whole thing and start over if you have to change so much?  I think the main story is good and I really think there is still a lot of good writing that I could make great.  So wish me luck, folks!